Women in the workforce

I was talking on the phone to Matt this morning and he mentioned that he’s had 3 or more women in the last month call in to take the day off because they were on their period. Um, what?! I had no idea that was a thing, let alone such a common one.

Let me decide my cramps are too uncomfortable and not come in to work. Oh wait, I can’t because I’m in AFGHANISTAN. Even if I wasn’t, I would take some Tylenol, suck it up and come to work. I don’t take that stance because I’m in the Army, I take that stance because I was raised with work ethic. My mother hurt her back and needed surgery but you can bet that as long as she was able to go to work, that’s where she was. There is a difference between being uncomfortable and being injured.

Have you ever wondered why people were skeptical of you when you had an injury and needed time off? Ever wonder why women on average make only 77% of what their male peers make? Wonder no more.

This little discovery led me to create this post about women in the workforce. 

This is my opinion and I am only speaking on what I know, so this is focused on women in the Army. However I am sure my points can be taken and used in many professions. 

As everyone is well aware, our army is predominantly male. My unit has about 15 women and 370 men. Some girls will use those numbers to get attention. With that being said I will discuss a few myths.

If you’re a woman in the military you will be a victim of sexual harassment or sexual assault.

Studies have shown high rates of sexual assault in the military. However the Army has made prevention a high priority and my unit takes its preventative training very seriously. Personally I have never had any issues; not even the inkling of an issue or an indicator of an issue. I find that if you stay professional it leaves very little wiggle room for work place harassment. To reduce the chance of harassment elsewhere, make sure you’re observant of your surroundings and listen to your instincts. I’m not saying victims were careless. I’m not saying victims ask for it. I am saying that there are things YOU can do to reduce your chances of becoming a victim.

You will be treated differently and given different roles and responsibilities because you’re a woman.

Not true. I have seen some women overlooked and I’ve seen some women that are strong leaders with lots of responsibility. How you’re treated depends on how you act. If you display Damsel in Distress tendencies, you will get discounted. That’s not sexist, it’s fair. The military doesn’t have room for people who act incompetent. All girls know how to act like a damsel in distress; that’s exactly what you’re doing when you allow someone else to do something you’re perfectly capable of doing. Other strong indicators are not pulling your own weight (someone needs help moving boxes of supplies and asks a few guys around you, if you keep doing what you’re doing instead of offering a hand you’re being a damsel) and allowing others to make decisions for you. At home all of that is perfectly acceptable, I mean a lot of guys love a damsel in distress, am I right?

That’s exactly why you cannot be one at work. As soon as you present yourself as an object of desire you will be treated as such. No one will look up to someone they perceive needs to be chased after and protected. Show that you deserve respect and can handle responsibility and it will be yours.

Having kids will negatively affect my career.

False. Having babies doesn’t negatively impact your career; not being open and honest with your chain of command or using the baby as an excuse to slack at work or take advantage of the situation does. Most commanders, 1SGs and CSMs are parents. They know how wonderful a family is and how taxing it can be on you. They also know when you’re using your family as an excuse to do subpar work. You’re on profile and the most important thing is that baby. Ok, got it. When your products are crap, others have to pick up your slack and all constructive criticism is met with, “but I’m on profile” and a threat to complain to IG; not ok. I am going to say this once, pay attention.

 When you cry wolf and abuse the system you make ALL women look bad and you ruin the help available to those who actually need it. Don’t be that woman girl. A woman knows better.

Acting feminine ruins your command presence.

Again, false. As I’ve discussed before, it’s acting like a Damsel in Distress that does that. Acting professional is the key that makes makeup, nail polish and other feminine touches acceptable.

If your Soldiers know that you are always out in the field when they are (without complaining), meet excel in Basic Soldiering Tasks, do your job well and that you look out for them they won’t care what color your nails are. Trust me. I have gone my entire deployment with a new color (that’s within regulations) on my nails each week, I use scented ‘girly’ lotion multiple times a day, wear makeup 2-3 times a week and you’ve seen my HOT PINK running shoes.

When my subordinates, peers and superiors talk to me, it’s about work. Everyone can obviously tell that I’m a female (duh). I don’t let that define me. My hard work, competence, the products I create and the assessments I give are what define who I am at work.

With all that being said, I will admit: there are sexist people out there. There are some people in the world that do discriminate based on gender. SOME. But I have found that the overwhelming majority of the Army (and America) will accept what you portray.

If you give them a Damsel in Distress, they’ll give you their attention and chase you for sport.

If you give them a responsible and capable woman, they’ll give you their respect. 

The choice is yours.